Horse Rider Humorist T-Shirts

"I've only travelled the ten miles to town once in my life - then my horse died!"

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 4

'Where's my horse?'

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

Spring has arrived, the flowers they bloom. The birds start to sing a happier tune. Everything's great! I'm reborn and free! THUNK! Except from winter's potholes swallowing me.

It is a good idea to start by learning how to mount your pony.

'I know you like your stallions tall Mary, but a clydesdale?'

Inappropriate horse whispering.

The Enemy

Never clip him yourself unless you are an expert.

Show Jumping Tantrums

Before her first dressage competition, Kate suffered from Pre-Traumatic Stress.

Lawyers Ridin' The Range: 'Happy trials to you, until we meet again!'

Polo pony

A Few Common Ailments

'Wait a minute, this guy is missing a head Oh jeez, we're totally gonna crash,'

"I'd love to help but at the moment I'm saddled with this enormous mortgage."

'This is one of those 'shovel ready' jobs you hear about.'

Riding instructor waits to fish a child out of jumping obstacle.

'I'm not taking any chances with the water jump this year.'

EAT HAY LOVE One Horse's Search for Everything

Horse accidents

'He thinks he's so hot but, personally, I'd rather be artificially inseminated.'

"I dumped my stable companion, he was seeing another pony!"

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Racing - No. II - IV

"Sure he's handsome. . . But I've heard he's hung like a human."

Journalist Interviewing a Fallen Rider.

"Boy, this is the life: For a bit of riding every day, we get fed, pampered and groomed..."

Oat Cuisine in Horse's Nosebag

Grooming: Make sure your pony is securely tied.

And balance with practice.