Honour Seeker Pillows

"Oh look, how utterly ridiculous - you're on the honours list!"

2021

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

Warrior Woman

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

Buoyed by his past success, William Tell sought even greater challenges,

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

In an unprecedented occurrence, Noah Webster fails his vocabulary test.

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

Tic-tac-toe

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

Human Rights for All

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

'Oh no its going to be one of those days.'

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

New Curriculum Timetable - All in Cantonese.

"I'm very pleased with the way you've handled this thankless boring job, Fenwick...."

"I could have gotten to the top . . . but I wasted all my time in the park."

'Knock it off, Gus! This is tough enough without your yodeling!'

"But, for ten million bucks, would you lick it?"

Honorable mention in science: the Nobel surprise.

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

Lourdes - wheelchairs left behind.

The real reason the Christmas Truce didn't last.

Monkey casino study.

'Sir Percy is here for his Purple Heart, Sire.'

'I was looking for a little stronger mission statement than that.'

'The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time.'