Homeric Hero Gifts

Chariot driver with a 'My Child is a Homer Student' bumper sticker.

"He was a very good boy."

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

Keyworker

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

"We've all said things about heliocentricity that look bad when taken out of context."

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

man juggling career, home and children

"The Equal Opportunity people say I can't call you my sidekick any more. You're now my personal assistant."

"Yes, the migration flight home is always faster, but it's thanks to the prevailing winds, not just because we're keen to get home..."

"He's retreated into nationalism."

The briefs on the outside? Actually it started by accident when I used to change in phone booths.

'Whoa, wait! Don't pull him out! He's plugging the hole!'

Superman's laundry

"I'm catching up on my inertia."

'I'm sorry. It appears Mr. Mitchell won't be accepting any more information today.'

'Love your renovations.'

Planner at work.

Mother's Day: 2nd Sunday in May, Others Day: Every day before and after the 2nd Sunday in May.

"My family's been working this land for at least 400 years...!"

'You know Doug just isn't a morning person. This afternoon's not looking too good, either.'

Heroes

'Charlie was badly wounded in WWII, and a everyday hero to us, so we bronzed his chair!'

"Well he's sweating, pale, and out of breath, but then again he's not used to being home doing the housework."

oh no - here comes the national trust again...

Sublime

Help - "What's in it for me?"

'Sixteen home runs, 34 runs batted in, and nine stolen bases. I'd call that being good.'

My dad is the bravest.

Castle Cat Flap

"This, 'being a housewife' lark, isn't so hard."

"I can't go out right now. It's cleaning day and my bucket list has a mop in it."

"Philip has questioned my stewardship."