Home Renovation Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

Welcome to the middle class Jer$ey $hore!'

'Now that you have a job, Tom, Dad and I are turning your room into a condo!'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

'I found the termites!'

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

"I said to myself, 'Maybe I can't change the world, but I can remodel my bathroom.' "

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

'For our next party, let's invite a carpenter, a painter and an upholsterer so they can help us clean up afterward.'

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

'For heaven's sake Janet - where have you disappeared to now?'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

"Okay, I fixed the leaking roof, and I moved the couch over to the far wall, but I'm sorry, I don't unblock toilets!"

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

'Letting him buy the stupid guns was the only way I'd ever get him to paint the house.'

"Well, you could wish for a new kitchen and a bathroom renovation; or alternatively you could just wish for a less idle husband."

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

'Don't say it! You're going to ask me if I notice anything different in here.'

'Hmmmm...lower.'

"Would you go nuts if I paint EVERYTHING pink!?"

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"