Home Prices T-Shirts

"...and the neighbors on both sides have credit scores over 800."

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

'You're doing that just to bug me, aren't you?'

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

Teddy queuing for the Bathroom

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"Trust me. It's no big deal. I'm even tuning you out right now."

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

'Mr. Fitzburger, didn't we agree on a no-pets-in-the-apartment policy?!!'

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

Real Estate Personals

An exaggeration of estate agents

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

"Try not to think of it as a box, but rather as an environmentally neutral, biodegradable, single person unit of accommodation!"

'Honey, I'm home.'

"Mom, could we stay in my old room until we're able to afford a place of our own?"

'Did you auction off our house on eBay?'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

Attack of the 65 - Inch Woman

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

'The Dow has shot up 2.5% on positive data on housing - until five minutes from now, when it'll be interpreted differently.'