Home Havoc Engineer T-Shirts

"Remodeling? No. Just looking for the remote."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

"See this area right here, honey? This is why we need to find someone who knows what they're doing."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

Search for Missing Socks

Fred's not sure who to call first: 911 or the plumber he should have called in the first place.

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

"Not cool washing sheep in the dishwasher people!"

Whack-A-Chore: "You play it all day, every day, until you can't anymore."

Pollsters

'As I said to Phil, 'Call a plumber!''

"It's perfectly all right. I used to do the same sort of thing when I was a little boy."

'I can't make dinner right now - I'm installing new software.'

"I thought it would be cheaper to weed wack our shag carpet rather than replace it."

'Don't worry about the dishes. I did them.'

"I'm running a loose ship."

'Until you remember where you put the ladder, be quiet!'

The house that Ruth built.

The Eternal Battle Over Who Is More Tired

'You must excuse us. Things are a bit upside-down at the moment.'

'Is the drain still clogged, Henry?'

'The good news is I've found a plumber... the bad news is he's coming from China.'

Woman is on computer searching a website for lost socks.

Leaking washing machine.

"Stop complaining...Just think of it as that, 'new hobby' you've been looking for."

Kitchen Appliances Fed Up With The Baby.

'This is my supply chain.'

'What do you mean I'm not putting in any sweat equity? I sweat every time you give me a bill.'

'So, apart from vacuuming, what else can the robot do?'

'Darn! The wife is gonna kill me for not reading the label.'