Home Decor T-Shirts

"You know your dog better than I do."

"They drown out all the neighbors' chimes."

"Pillows for sleeping on are downstairs. These are all for screaming into."

No soliciting - especially if it's for a good cause.

"Of course, we can do spare and minimalist, but not on your budget."

"Come on in—sorry about the mess, we're just in the middle of not caring anymore."

"Honey, the Malcontents are here."

Another Energy-Saving Idea From Your Electric-Eel Council:

"Actually, I don't read much, they're just background for my video calls."

'Something is missing.'

Trouble Ahead

'The ad said Reduced 50% so I bought it. Let's not argue over semantics.'

"Just because you collect them doesn't make them collectibles."

"Remember when all we had was lots of little pillows?"

'Now remember, he spent $400 on that, so no matter what, we can never play with it.'

'I told you nylon carpets were a mistake.'

"I'd like you to meet my pillows."

A hammer sits in front of his hunting trophies

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Please excuse him, he's intent.

Fred brings home one too many cute refrigerator magnets.

Man paints himself into corner.

"The HOA is bustin' my chops about my paint colors!"

'Are you sure energy efficient isn't just a nice way of saying you're not too bright?'

Mattress sale

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

'That's the color paint we need.'

"Great blinds think alike.

'Since the kids left home, Harold and I are thinking of looking for a smaller place.'

"Would our big tacky objects look good here?"

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

"I want the whole thing gutted."

"I've got sky in my bedroom."

Caveman sees welcome mat saying, 'Wipe Your Knuckles'.

'I prefer it this way.'