Home Comfort Enthusiast Pillows

"If you want something firmer, I suggest you try our flooring department."

'Okay, I can take a hint, I'll turn on the furnace.'

'Carpets' 'Try before you buy'

"When I first met Howard, he had a touch of class. As it turns out, it was just a touch."

"It helps me feel accepted in the world."

"I think that exercising during the lockdown involves more than lifting the remote control."

....that time when Frank went to Denmark. It wa just an ordinary bed, but Frank couldn't convince himself to lie down in it.

"And do you promise never to fight over the thermostat setting?"

"I'm staging a battle between the humidifier and the dehumidifier."

"I'm no longer cleaning my whole apartment. . . Just the 'Zoom Zone.'"

"It says to allow your new mattress 48 hours to fully expand."

"I'm not a ghost - I just died changing the duvet cover..."

'I wish our washer and dryer were on the first floor. . . It'd be more convenient.'

'I miss my water bed.'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

'I'd rather be working from home.'

"There ya go. Cushion rot from farting into the same old chair for 40 years"

"Honey, you're doing that thing again where you stare into space and wonder how I talked you into leaving the house."

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"I didn't spark joy."

“Can I have her now? Hey! My turn.”

Unicorn Working From Home

"You're never home."

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

Contented man and cat sleeping

"He's an indoor cat."

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

"Honey! He's breached the recliner! I repeat, the puppy has breached my La-Z-Boy!!"

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

And this model comes with a fitness tracker.

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

"To keep warm in winter you're looking at a new central heating system costing £20,000."