Home Brewing Hero T-Shirts

'To save money, Bob started making his own wine. This Chablis, for example, only cost him $329 a bottle.'

A mailbox outside a house reads "The Larson Family and Microbrewery".

A Good Batch.

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

You're the puff in my pastry!

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

You've Had Enough!

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

"I thought the cake came out awfully dense."

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

'According to this, she began making wine in her laundry room 30 years ago, and now she's moved on to the garage.'

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

Heloise's Helpful Hints for Homebound

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

My dad makes his own beer.

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

'Doesn't seem right somehow-REAL ale in PLASTIC glasses!'

'I should never have let you pick the taps!'

'I brew it myself.'

'There are shortcuts to making home brew, but taking a swig of malt extract and letting it ferment in your mouth isn't one of them.'

Serving wine - "I make it myself."

"Barry made the wine. I made the cheese."

'Potatoes. How many would I need to make a bottle of vodka?'

'Why bother recreating the 5,000-year-old recipe fo the ancient Egyptians, when there's already one that old at the back of the fridge?'

'But our secret ingredient is large quantities of Hilberg beer.'

"We grind our own catnip."

"We had no sherry so I left him some of your dad's home brew instead."