Holy Land Explorer Gifts

'Never mind that. I think I've just discovered a new planet!'

'I want to charter a tour of the promised land, double occupancy for 40,000...'

"Good game."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'Can we sit in the balcony today? Huh? Can we?'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

'St. Joseph's Church,today's sermon, the road to heaven (free maps)'

Parachuting bishop.

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

The joy of sects.

Monk on the beach

"I'm saving you with this booklet about the Kingdom of Heaven."

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

Airports.

Cherub on a cloud

Anubis loved his evening rides.

'I know we're laying up treasures in Heaven, but I still think you should talk to the Church Board about your pension,'

'Osgood was a theologian back on Earth, and he thought all this stuff would be allegorical.'

'To be honest, I think it's a bit of a let down up here.'

'I‘ll be relieved when they invent the aeroplane, these long trips are playing havoc with my wings'.

"Being reborn, eh? What better time to learn about our Lord? He was smooshed for your sins - did you know that?!"

"Bible studies class? We're still writing it."

'I'm telling you, with the right moisturizer and lip balm you could avoid all of that chaffing.'

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 5.

Daniel O'Connell

'Late husband.'

John Bunyan and Alfred Deakin

'Well, so much for the 'no new commandments' pledge!'

'Damned tourists.'

Priests on plane - "We must be near head office."

'You are here.'

"I want to get off the parkway." "Thirty-five cents! First window please!"

'What if the Virgin Mary hadn't gone along with the idea?'

'What time does the train leave for Shangrila?'