Holy Grail Enthusiasts Pillows

"THIS is the cup of a Carpenter."

Home Sweet Home

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

Giant Monster in Bath

'Look, you're just going to have to cut back. Times have changed. . . Today's kids are full of hydrogenated oils, trans fats, corn syrup, and all kinds of preservatives.'

"Darn autocorrect!"

'This is our golden anniversary. Let's invest in gold.'

Ale. Mead. It's been a hard knight's day!

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

"I was hoping you'd consider this a prelude to a kiss."

"They have to clean her up before they show her to God."

The Inn Keeper's Wife and Daughter taking care of the Don after being beaten and bruised.

Little Red Riding Hoodie

"Ugh! Here comes WIlliam Tell and overtures."

"I get it!"

"Don't forget to call it a 'procedure'—it makes it less scary."

'None shall pass!'

Babe in the woods!

Red riding hood giving the wolf a complex

Lovers

Medieval King

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

Geoffrey Chaucer

'Hey, I've found another one! Let's go and play marbles...'

"I was going to transmute it into gold, and then I read that the base metal market has made a remarkable recovery!"

The refinancing didn't come through -- I say we just walk away from the project.

Vampire afternoon tea.

"Guard this with your life. The value of gold has gone way up against the dollar."

"I conjured you up a dress, shoes, a corsage, and a limo—I'm not ponying up for an afterparty too."

"Add Your Own Caption Week # 222"

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

"It's eagle before snake except after feather."

Parsifal

'Listen I think we should break up...it's not you... it's that thing on your face.'