Holy Grail Enthusiasts Pillows

"THIS is the cup of a Carpenter."

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

Giant Monster in Bath

'Look, you're just going to have to cut back. Times have changed. . . Today's kids are full of hydrogenated oils, trans fats, corn syrup, and all kinds of preservatives.'

"Darn autocorrect!"

'This is our golden anniversary. Let's invest in gold.'

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

"I was hoping you'd consider this a prelude to a kiss."

"They have to clean her up before they show her to God."

"Ugh! Here comes WIlliam Tell and overtures."

The Inn Keeper's Wife and Daughter taking care of the Don after being beaten and bruised.

"I get it!"

"Don't forget to call it a 'procedure'—it makes it less scary."

'None shall pass!'

Lovers

Babe in the woods!

Medieval King

Red riding hood giving the wolf a complex

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

Geoffrey Chaucer

Vampire afternoon tea.

"I conjured you up a dress, shoes, a corsage, and a limo—I'm not ponying up for an afterparty too."

'Hey, I've found another one! Let's go and play marbles...'

"I was going to transmute it into gold, and then I read that the base metal market has made a remarkable recovery!"

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

"Add Your Own Caption Week # 222"

"Guard this with your life. The value of gold has gone way up against the dollar."

"It's eagle before snake except after feather."

'Her first telekinesis!'

"Out bending spoons at Pop's diner."

'Listen I think we should break up...it's not you... it's that thing on your face.'