Hollywood Watcher Pillows

"Haven't you noticed, Ned, how everyone's films are getting shallower except mine."

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

Tom Hanks

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

Meet Santa's entourage

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

'Burke's B-list celebrities.'

"This lovely song tells of a young, pretty actress, her ups and downs, and how she found happiness after rehab."

"Once again, the epicenter seems to be Christian Slater."

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

"Don't forget the screenplay."