Hollywood Starlet Pillows

Entering California

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

"The script isn't funny, but maybe if we put some unfunny actors in it and get an unfunny director it will be funny."

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

"So, do you see yourself as a car valet who writes screenplays or a screen writer who parks cars?"

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'I don't know where to begin in deciding what I want to be when I grow up...I want people to shut and leave me alone, and I need lots of attention, so...'

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

"I'm thinking action roles might not really be your thing."

"Once again, the epicenter seems to be Christian Slater."

Death Styles of the Rich and Famous

Hollywood or bust!

Kids with skates waiting for the ice to grow.

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

"It's been done, but I don't think it's been redone."

Welcome to Hollywood

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

"He's left a suicide screenplay."

'And who are you wearing?'

Live the Dream!

For richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health for a full 13 episodes...?

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

'It's 'big office' meets 'poorly-received flop'!'

When stars marry: 'Why did you ask him first? Does he have top billing?'

"You know that kid that submitted a screenplay to us on the back of a restaurant menu? I'm passing on it. I like the screenplay, but I hate that restaurant."

Peter Lorre caricature

"I'm sorry. We don't want a ring-tailed lemur. We want a ring-tailed-lemur type."

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"Wait a minute... You're not Warren Gurkenman the famous actor, but his stuntman?!"