Hollywood Culture Pillows

"Call my attorney and say that I killed Ted in self-defense. Call my publicist and say that I wish Ted the best of luck in all his future endeavors."

"YouTube's one thing, but cats will never make it on the big screen."

"Last night, I had the weirdest dream sequence."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

Canadian film production

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

Tom Hanks

"Citizen Kane first draft... Citizen Kane By Orson Welles & Herman J. Mankiewicz Int. Kane's bedroom Kane's old voice Call a freaking ambulance! Rosebud..."

"Which part are you reading for?"

"Hello. I'm director Bob ('Blue Fires') Munsey and this is screenwriter Doris ('Highway to Nowhere') Winslow."

'At last, the newly discovered films of Woody Alien.'

'Vital mission - movie parody'

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

David Niven caricature

Los Angeles, 1928: Mickey Mouse Emerges from the Primordial Ooze.

Hollywood Breakup

Wizard of Oz - repeat fees

Blockbuster Billion Club

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'I don't know where to begin in deciding what I want to be when I grow up...I want people to shut and leave me alone, and I need lots of attention, so...'

The Directors Gut.