Hollywood At Heart Gifts

'Fair's fair - I'll only be Jennifer Lopez as long as you're Mel Gibson!'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

Leslie Caron.

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

Canadian film production

Why you've never heard of Ricky Rat.

Buster Keaton

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

"Citizen Kane first draft... Citizen Kane By Orson Welles & Herman J. Mankiewicz Int. Kane's bedroom Kane's old voice Call a freaking ambulance! Rosebud..."

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

"Which part are you reading for?"

Tom Hanks

Film Star Robert de Niro

Hollywood Breakup

"They tell me you're a man who has True Magritte."

Martin Scorsese

Quentin Tarantino

'At last, the newly discovered films of Woody Alien.'

"Hello. I'm director Bob ('Blue Fires') Munsey and this is screenwriter Doris ('Highway to Nowhere') Winslow."

Blockbuster Billion Club

Los Angeles, 1928: Mickey Mouse Emerges from the Primordial Ooze.

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

'Vital mission - movie parody'

Jim Carrey,

David Niven caricature

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'I don't know where to begin in deciding what I want to be when I grow up...I want people to shut and leave me alone, and I need lots of attention, so...'

Jack Nicholson

Geoffrey Rush

"Although the depiction of gangland activity in this film is not accurate over all, I would like to go on record as saying that I am not entirely displeased with Mr. Robert De Niro's portrayal of a gentleman whom I take to have been a former associate of yours truly."