Holistic Healing Pillows

"He said he couldn't help me unless I hurt all over."

Common sense - in one ear, and out the other.

"Please escort Miss Delgado to the private waiting room. She's curing my patients again."

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

New Age Store.

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

The Farmer Sutra.

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

Extreme Naturopathic Medicine.

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

Alternative Medicine.

Acupuncture clinic

The New Age Dentist.

'It's anxiety. Don't worry, vitamin B happy.'

"Tell you what, dude, I'm writing you a prescription for a scented candle and some granola."

"And this one is made of ancient crystals that detoxify the air and remove all the money from your pocket."

Man passes Holistic Health Clinic and sees Holistic Donuts.

"Your life line is a little weak, but we can fix that."

Advertisements for 'Brother Marsh- faith healer and Deacon 'Speed' Alton- emergency room'.

"The amethyst has calming properties – which is great when you’re out of Xanax."

"I understand he's in aroma therapy.''

Alternative medicine

'I hope this alternative Chinese medicine works!'

"The Pain may be due to your Yin and Yang being out of alignment, but humour me and lets see if your broken let is part of the problem."

'When it comes to stress relief, I believe in a holistic approach.'

"We're making exiting advances in alternative car care."

'I'm trying homeopathcy, what are you trying?' 'Acupuncture!'

'Jake's Alternate Pharmacy.'