Holiday Rocker Gifts

Santana Claus

Christmas Tree

"This next one's another oldie."

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

Santa does a keg stand.

Temporarily Unavailable

"Don't forget to put some sunscreen on your tongue."

Too old to rock'n'roll now, Sir?

"Better lose the hat people are staring."

"So yes, I bit him! How was I supposed to know it was Master wearing a red fat-suit and a fake white beard?"

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"Trick or treat?"

Santa Metal Claus

"I wasn't ho-ho-ho'ing at you, I was ho-ho-ho'ing with you."

Inbox and outbox for books

"Of course it's not a mirage - mirages don't wear Chanel No 5."

Theatrical Christmas.

December Fest

Now Playing: Christmas ? The Ultimate feel-Good Musical!

T'was the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring...except Bert who had a weak bladder!

The night after Christmas.

"Find out who's on vacation and then add this stuff to the workload on his desk."

"It's our fault. We put out milk & cookies and now we can't get rid of him."

Baggage Reclaim

'Do you think they'll feed us something special for Christmas dinner?'

Are we nearly there yet?

Kringle: The Decca Years

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

'It's not just the Oktoberfests, it's the novemberfests, birthdayfests, flagdayfests, mayfests, arboedayfests...'

"There are thirty four children in my class...thirty one naughty, three nice."

"Sure, I love the scent of a REAL tree, but nothing beats the convenience of ignoring the holidays altogether."

Modern Day Christmas Carolers

A man staying afloat on an anchor at sea.