History Affectionado Pillows

"Uh-oh - climate change."

They don't feed the animals in here very well, do they!

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

'All cats have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a cat.'

'Well, migration is just a change of scenery really, as all our friends and family come too...'

"Dear Diary: Today I picked a peck of pickled peppers."

"We are here to remove a blockage in your bank account."

'So he eats the odd secretary now and then. He's our top actuary and I intend to make him a partner.'

"On the other hand, his bedside manner is impeccable."

'A corsage! How sweet of you!! It's delicious!!! '

Alderman shocked at a proposal to pull down Temple Bar

Eating raw cake mix.

The balance of power shifted when sparky figured out how to use the laser pointer.

'Made your point.'

'I need work on my core.'

"I've just been gazumped!"

'Your Dad phoned earlier and told me that this is how he wanted it fixed.'

'My cat is very unpredictable. I never know when he's going to ignore me.'

'Uh oh, looks like he had a tough day at the office: Let's jump around to cheer him up...'

It's so nice to meet someone with a porpoise in life.

'According to this book, goldfish have a 3 second memory...'

'The time to really worry is when credit's not even crunchy!'

Dogs With Balloons Tied to Ears

"Puppy love."

Best guess, nuclear war or the French football camp!

'I was going for gold, but I'm afraid all I could manage was bronze!'

Cow looks confused at his toilet Christmas present.

"We go to Stockholm, we accept our, prize, and then I never want to see your ugly mug again!"

Metal Defective.

'Something is missing.'

The Ethel Mormon Tabernacle Choir

"Yeah, I was into the pet thing for a while, but that scene wasn't for me."

"Stay away from those ... they're fruitcake crumbs."

A hunter missing his target