Historical Irony Enjoyer Gifts

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

Made in China

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

Right-thinking people against wrong-thinking people

'You keep turning them out and I'll dig a parking garage.'

A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.

'It always great to get away from it all.'

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

John Bull presenting the building for the 1862 International Exhibition to Britannia

Please help. Always in the wrong place at the wrong time.

'I want my lectures to have entertainment value.'

'You're proposing to me with, cubic zirconias?... But, you're a diamond dealer!'

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

"Of course no one wants a forest fire anywhere, anytime. It can be devastating. That's why I feel so guilty."

Leaking Hudson River paintings.

'I'm afraid Mr. Caldwell doesn't want to see you now. However, you're free to visit his web site.'

An artist creates a sculpture of a "thumbs up" and is then crushed by it.

"When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one person to dissolve the marital bonds which have connected her with another..."

'Kill all the Canaanites? -- Won't that set a bad precedent?'

"The house next door is slated for demolition, but your house is in the way."

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.

Perfection Troubleshootors.

"No worries. I'm well-prepped and ready for anything they might throw at me."

"Oh sure, it's easy to blame your husband, when he's not here to defend himself."

'I only make predictions in retrospect.'