Hermit Crabs Pillows

"I've always dreamt of learning, but as a hermit crab, it's not possible: it takes two to tango..."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Hermit Crabapple Tree

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Crab with a clown face.

Cellphone Islands

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

"These few weeks off school have convinced me that I'm definitely a stay-at-home kid."

OM, SWEET OM

How Relaxing It Is To Go To The Beach. . . How Close You Live To The Beach.

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

Bearded old man atop mountain.

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"The meaning of life! Have you tried Googling it?"

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

"Free why-fi.”

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

"Do you see the person who stole your home from you in the courtroom today?"

"So, you're staying in then?"

"Are you willing to relocate?"

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

Woman meets up with guru: 'Oh, there you are, honey. Dinner's getting cold.'

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

Buy one enlightenment get one free.

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

'Because Elvis is FULL of philosophical insights.'

'Hey! - Do I have to separate you two?'

'One of us will tell you how to achieve peace and harmony just as soon as we settle who called dibs on this ledge.'

'Enlightenment does that to some people.'

'He's at the pinnacle, but not at the pinnacle of his PROFESSION.'