Heritage Reflector T-Shirts

'I think we're losing sight of our roots.'

Pete Townshend Vineyards

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

Scot to a Greek: 'Love your outfit.'

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

"This house has been in my family for a considerable period of time."

'Can you remember where you were when you first realized you were full of crap?'

"Who knew a lifeless box could spread such fear? It came from the mailbox."

He was a great dodgeball player. Who's in heaven now. He will be missed.

Wedding in Westminster Abbey

"If I've got no messages how do I know I even EXIST!"

'This babbling brook reminds me I should probably call my wife.'

'Alice, call the emergency doctor! I just thought 'Hey, I've made enough money!''

Plymouth Rock Long Term Parking, $1 per Day.

"Tireless worker? Well, when I was young, yes, but not anymore I can tell you..."

"You have turned out well, my sons. I can go in peace."

'There is no room in the church for damaged goods Rodney.'

"I spent $1,000 on this great painting. And I spent $2,000 on college courses to know why it is great!"

"I can afford to die or I can afford to be sick, but I can't afford to be sick and then die."

'We've all read the report cover to cover. Anyone read all that stuff in the middle?'

'When you smile the whole ... cynical world laughs at you.'

Retirement...Retirement...

Would be interested in a job inspecting mirrors? I could see myself doing that.

'There's something to be said for being in the lowly 1-percent group in today's economy...right?'

"What's that look? C'mon, you're scaring me!"

"Everything I have, son, I have because your grandfather left it to me. I see now that that was a bad thing."

"I fondly remember the time before the money ran out."

"Someday I want to be rich enough to get rid of everything and live like a monk."

Death of Arafat.

'Dang! -- STILL no lifetime achievement award!'

'When I was your age, the closest thing I had to texting was spelling things out in my alphabet soup.'

Investments: Surgeon-General's Warnings - Money won't make you happy.

'Good old middle class sex.'

Stamp collector.