Height Humorist Gifts

Suggestion Box: 'Hang it lower!'

"I just don't know. It's a really difficult decision."

Jungle Games

"I like to you, and I'd dance with you, but you're not my type...you know...tall!"

Stilts.

'The bad news is he wants to be a jockey.'

'I wish I was your height. My mom keeps the cookies on the top shelf where I can't reach them.'

'I don't set the rules, but you do need to accept that you're a pony and move on Brian!'

Colossalism: The religious belief that tall people exist so short people can walk through crowds.

"Actually, I got my nickname because I live in a loft."

Short man to tall man: 'It's such a cliche to call short people aggressive, and if you do it again I'll punch your lights out.'

Short man standing on stilts to take a picture with a camera on a tripod.

Passport Photos.

'Seems like Joe now has three feet. His mother says he's grown another foot.'

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

Hopkins has been in charge of giraffes for 25 years.

'Midgely, we've decided to put Gillen on this project.'

Tall Hat, Short Hat

How to Reach the Top

'What lovely views, shame your husband is afraid of heights.'

Circus trousers

"I identify as six-two."

"I take it you're the new short stop."

"With my boxing career, I was good at jabs and hooks, but my weakness was uppercuts."

"Did you order the stretch limo?"

'Size matters on the Podium.'

Why Giraffes Are Rarely Feature In Comic Strips

"That's still too high"

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Tall major and small page boy

A short man with a tall wife is said to have married beneath him.

A short person jumping on a tall person's head in an attempt to make him smaller

Basketball

'He just looks taller than me because he walks upright!'

Climbing into the bathtub