Heckle Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Don't look now, but the winner of last season's 'The Biggest Heckler' is here.'

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

"I suspect your headaches may be the result of you being exposed to someone with an undiagnosed case of cabin fever."

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

The Sculptor

Not waiting for someday to look back on this and have a good laugh.

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'

Australian baby with toys hanging from his hat rather than corks

"If they're already killing you, you know they're the right fit."

'You got here just in time - These shoes are killing you.'

"Oh, shut up. Who isn't in your shoes?"

"I just adore these shoes! The clicking of staccato heels is so empowering. . . Do these come in a flat?"

'No fair, man. How come you get a dessert fork?'

'Quick Betty, come round to the Red Lion and wear your highest heels.'

"I always wear 5 inch heels to a doctor's appointment. That makes me the perfect weight for my height."

"Height is the only thing I'm capable of changing about myself."

Finally, a big puffy hand for the losing team.

Children playing with scissors in the nursery

'On a more positive note, your hot flashes will seem relatively cool.'

Carole Jean's First "Big Girl" Heels

Devil with Fire and Brimstone In-Trays.

Sculptor with falling rocks sign.

'Call me a slave to fashion, but how do I get down from these without killing myself?'

High heel

'I just got text-heckled!'

"If I didn't know before I sure as hell know who Manolo Blahnik is now."

'This is why I had to pad my resume.'

"Inside I'm a crying hyena."

'Foul ball!!'

Rodin's Block

A short legged lady bug is among long legged ones.

The Fashion Industry Disappears: 'Oh God, what comfortable shoes.'