Heavenly Football Fan Pillows

"Excellent Hail Mary."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Football Chameleon

Pregnant Cheerleaders,

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"Wanna toss the ol' virtual pigskin?"

"Uptight End"

"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

'David when we said we would like you to be a role model for us. . .'

Archaeologists discover a football

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

'Now what?!'

Sunday Sermon: Does God Prefer Particular Sports Teams?

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'Well it's too bad you're not a black widow like me, Slyvia...'

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

Referee cop.

Monks play conkers with crucifix

"Go deep!"

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

'Bad boy! Drop the quarterback! Drop him! Drop!!'

'And if the scores remain level, you can text the name of the team you want to keep in the tournament.'

Paradise FC: The Blessed Y The Rest.

Red Card - Gold Card.

Football Violence

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'