Healthy Living Iconoclast T-Shirts

"I think it's time we define the practical limits of your Paleo diet."

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

On the back of the t-shirt...

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

The Fast Lane.

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

Yoga vs. Prosecco

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

To do before Saturday...

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

The trim reaper

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

WHO checklist

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

"Moses, some of the people are requesting gluten free manna."