Healthy Eats Explorer Pillows

'I'm taking you off mud, slop, and sows.'

Before/After

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

'Is this still America?'

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

"Made with a little extra TLC – and THC for good measure."

Pastrami in the wild

Attack of the 'health' foods

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

"I've tried 5 diets and haven't lost a pound. Maybe I shouldn't try them all at the same time."

Journey of a sandwich through the digestive system.

'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'

'Sorry Sir, you've had enough,'

Nutritional Supplements.

You have no experience eating lobster? Before I spend time showing you how, do you have experience tipping?

'What the devil is that?

"You know they're trying too hard when the chef's special is Corn Dogs Bordelaise."

"As you can see, my culinary creations are eclectic."

Lactose intolerance.

"I'm sorry, but Chef Scott feels he's moved beyond that concept."

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

"All these vitamins and nutrients, plus it makes it own sauce! We should be eating this!"