Healthcare Strategist Pillows

NHS targets.

'That does it. . . Little Freddie is not going to law school! He's going to become an oncologist, Mary a gerontologist and Stevie a pharmacist! We'll be covered!'

"It's the hospital board performing surgery on the budget."

'Uh, boss...can you figure out why our health plan includes dental coverage from one of your competitors?'

'Is this a good time to talk about health insurance?'

'Follow the solid line.'

Cost/Value

Medical personnel give their hearts

Cannabis: Anti-seizure Medication

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

'We don't have a cure for your ailment but there is an appropriate app available.'

"Oh, and add a couple of intentional typos to my weekly email update...I want to appear warm and authentic!!"

'Excuse me, sir. Could you spare $2000,000 to treat an uninsurable pre-existing condition?'

"Dr. Eliot, would you let the dog out?"

"Your test results are back. We're going to have to remove your appendix and your wallet."

'The surgery is expensive. We'll have to numb you from the wallet down.'

"I was forced into early retirement. Is that even legal?"

'Brain surgery? I have an app for that!'

"We probably need to rethink our revenue strategy for the practice."

'So if you DO break up which of you will be keeping the untreated patients and bankrupt hospitals?'

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

"That's too big a pill for me to swallow, Harold!"

Cleaner with nameplate next to Consultant Surgeon's desk.

"If you keep perfectly still, I can do all five cavities at once."

DNA doctor

"We tried every fix the insurance companies allow but it still won't fly!"

"John says you've all been compassionate and caring! Would you please stop... or he'll expect that at home!"

'That was quick!'

The world of medicine as we know it, will end soon.

"Murray's the guy you replaced. He's decided to fight to get his job back."

"Instead of burying it, invest in pharmaceuticals."

'Nothing about universal health care?'

So, did you see any of those facist, right wing, anti-population growth zealots on your way in here?

"We've been so consolidated the last few years our logo is a mishmash of a bit of everything."

"I'm referring you to a doctor with different software."