Healthcare Buff Pillows

'There's no cure, but the good news is we have some great support groups!'

'We just set a new record for tubes and wires in one patient.'

'I can explain the meaning of life, but I'm having trouble myself signing up for Affordable Healthcare.'

'I'm afraid the surgeon couldn't perform your operation, because you weren't wearing clean underpants.'

PCT funding crisis threatens maternity pay.

'Enforcers are SO yesterday. I've got NHS managers to take care of that part of the business.'

'I had a larger sample for you but I had trouble getting the lid back on. . .'

"Mr. Bermudez has a kidney stone and it should come out by itself."

Vaccines for 12 year olds in the EU

"Give it to me straight, Doc. It's my infrastructure, isn't it?"

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"We need to update your entire operating system."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

"It's good you're avoiding radioactive pieces of your destroyed home planet that deprive you of your superpowers... but you should also watch the sodium."

Man with arrow in back - "We're going to run some tests to see if it's psychosomatic."

'Those fish-oil treatments doing your arthritis any good?'

'...but besides this, how are you doing?'

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

'I decide reimbursement rates at the Healthcare Exchange of Oz!'

ANd the Oscar for the best special side effects goes to ASTRAZENECA!

So, have you had this 'human flu' yet?

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

A doctor calls a body builder to perform a patella tap test on a large patient.

"We've geared up our American company to provide PPE for our healthcare providers, and we need 'Made in the USA' tags to on 'em! Problem is, USA tags are all Made In China."

"Relax, I'm only hear to see my osteopath."

'I know just how you feel.'

'I know a lot of you have been sharing your opinions regarding health care and I just wanted to remind you, stay out of the road!'

'Why are you giving me an allergy shot. Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-allergy shot?'

'Talk about high-tech! You'll be getting a pacemaker ipod combo.'

"Can't talk now. Cramming for tomorrow's stress test."

Medicare: More is Better!