Healthcare Battler T-Shirts

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

The Buck Never Stops.

"You want a generic or a regular sugar pill?"

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

Bureaucracy gone mad!

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'Let me guess - you lost a fight against a young challenger who has now replaced you as the company's alpha male!'

Empty Calories Vending Machine.

Doctor surrounded by notes.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed mini-mall site, but that I'm not as familiar with your galaxy's zoning laws as I'd like to be.'

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

GPs could be forced to switch IT systems onto new NHS digital contract

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

'Word has it that you have an ulcer, Tomkins. Nice going! You'll find an extra 20 bucks in your paycheck.'

'The good news is it's curable, the bad news is you can't afford it.'

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

"Ambitions... to finish on the winning side for a change."

"I think she's having a Spontaneous Paperwork Induced Collapse."

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

Please seat to be weighted.

Bureau of Red Tape

"Someday my grant will come."

"In principle we're happy with the trust idea...as long as it's properly monitored and regulated!"

'When I die, please cremate me and send my ashes to the tax office. . .Write on the envelope, 'Now, you have everything.''

'You have a good chance of recovery, if you can make it through hospital admissions.'

NHS application system: 'Let me in! I'm a Junior Doctor!'

'...or you could fill out this Form 666 and get a filing extension for all eternity.'

'I'm sorry, sir, but this particular loophole is only for the use of Federal employees.'

"More government regulations, Mr. Maslin?"

'The doctors said you were so nervous about the operation they had to give you a tranquiliser.'

"For all the years I've worked here you've had it in for me...so will you get off my case."

"The doctor's nurse's nurse practitioner will see you now."

Skills and experience held back by bureaucracy and protocols.