Health Contradiction Comedy Pillows

100 Fat. Now with 50 less fat.

'Dear Diarrhea, Day 84. Well, I'm constipated again today...'

Centaur for Disease Control Says Wear a Mask

"Look! A dying brain cell! Maybe we should help!...."

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

'I've got this feeling, like a heavy weight on my stomach.'

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

How To Make A Pigs Ear Out Of Swine Flu.

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

'Will we ever get a morning-after pill for over-eating?'

"Looks like you both suffer from IBS. You...irritable bowel. Your friend...irritable burl."

'She says she has a prenatal appointment.'

Milk Toast: One of the World's Most Deadly Foods!

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

Man tapping a tuning fork on another man's knee

"I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?"

"Early Bird, you need to go easy on the worms."

"Wuhan virus, Ebola, West Nile, Asian Flu. . . what's wrong with good old American diseases?"

'When I die could you preserve my liver for medical research? You've done that already.'

'That reminds me - your hospital appointment is next week.'

'I believe it's 'feed a fever and starve a lawyer.''

'When did the treadmill replace the rat race?'

"At least you made it into the hallway."

'That old 'diet and exercise scam' again!'

'Well my lightest ever was 7lbs 4oz. . .'

'Your lab tests are back. Your cholesterol weight, and self importance are all too high.'

We can identify the genetic root of many problems... however your husbands being a long strak of water isn't one of them!

"I think that form '10,000' steps may have been 9,999 too many!"

"Guess who's shot to number one in the charts. The Cure."

'Time for your One-a-Year vitamin supplement pill, dear.'

You're going to give me a hay fever shot? Shouldn't I be getting an anti hay fever shot?

"The sleeping pills take time to work. Don't expect results overnight."

"I'm afraid a hearing aid will make me look old."

"Patient. . . seems. . . reluctant. . . to get his. . . prostate. . . checked. . ."