Health-conscious Home Cooks T-Shirts

"Every time you say something is good for me, I know it's going to taste yucky!"

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Lady of the Cake.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"You do like octopus?"

Domestic Goddess.

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

But is it organic?

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

'Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!'

"Isn't it great to get out of the kitchen and cook in the fresh air!"

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

Is that pancake ready yet?

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

"... Oh, don't worry, I won't 'overcook it'... I hope you like, sushi."

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

Lockdown casserole

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

Baking

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

Surprise in the salad bowl

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."