Health Committee Member Gifts

"Maybe the young would be more vigilant if we told them they could pass the virus on to their nearest and dearest, i.e. their phones."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

London GPs could become an endangered species.

'Hanson - committee of four.'

'What we need is a decision, not more foot-dragging.'

"The state of graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my colleegs agrree that there maths isn't much better."

'It may not be our usual business lunch, but it will sure impress the hell out of the budget committee.'

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

'Okay, let's go over this again: You tell me your great ideas, I repeat them back to you, then you tell me I have a great idea and I get all the credit for it!'

Looking for the cause of high health care costs. . .

"There's no need to go round the table - I know who I am."

Coronavirus Debate

Plain English group.

'Have you heard about the new Medicare drug plan called plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada!'

'I'll see your Social Security Supplement and raise you Medicare and a Canadian pharmacy ID.'

"All those in favor Retweet."

"The vote is tied. Half of us think the proposed plan is astoundingly asinine, and the other half finds it stupid beyond belief. Let's try to find a middle ground here, people!"

'It's a brand new state-of-the-art waiting room.'

'I'm sorry Bill, but some things in medicine we doctors just can't explain...like insurance forms.'

'I'm death for goodness sake - why do I have to adopt a more healthy lifestyle?'

"The Board just wants to be sure you're well supported."

'Your hospital needs more nurses? So hire more nurses!'

Santa Claus delivers the vaccine.

"The steering-committee three are we. Run it by us, and we'll see."

'Due to cutbacks on your insurance plan, your visits to Dr. Phil are no longer covered. You'll have to start seeing Physician's Assistant Phil.'

World Health Organization

Profits for Big Pharma

'That's it, in a nutshell.'

'Excellent - it's unanimous!'

"The first goal of our ad hoc committee should be to learn Latin."

Antibiotics versus probiotics: A battle of wills.

'How can I help you? We offer - choice, diversity or competition.'

"I suppose the first thing to do is form an escape committee."

'Legislature' doctor scratching his head over a syringe marked 'Free market Principles' with those marked 'Regulations' in the bin