Health And Lifestyle Pillows

'I'll tell you one thing - if I knew I'd live this long I'd have taken better care of myself.'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

2021

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

What the Doctor Ordered

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'Well, well, well...'

Lactose Intolerant

On the back of the t-shirt...

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"Your contents have shifted."

PSA Banter.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Low-Energy Drinks

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Bad for you but to die for