Hardware Hobbyists Pillows

Ironmongers

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"He's having a hard time finding work."

Honey remember what I said about feeding the birds.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes

'Computers' 'Hardware' 'Software'

'He may not be accurate but he's resourceful'

Silver Sufferer - husband looking at steam trains on the internet, wife bored in background

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

'-and I suppose you want chips with it?'

"I will place this broken phone charger in the 'man' drawer. Where in six months time, it will magically fix itself."

'It's a pop-up book about how ebooks are killing publishing.'

Female nail has been hammered in. Says to male nail: 'Sorry, I have a headache.'

'I'd like you to meet the saw, the hammer and, well, you know the drill.'

Absurd semi-auto hairdressing machine

"You've got to compress it because my email account is limited to 3MB."

"You fix it by buying a new one."

Power and the Glory tools

Very old fashioned computer.

Project Supreme Fuel Efficiency

'Mary finally solved the blinking clock problem by putting black tape over it.'

A man's whole body is twisted after using a power drill.

'That one, and that one, and that one, and. . .'

'I'm the one who has to find them, so I embedded the locator chip in their wool!'

Frankenstein D.I.Y.

To continue with tech support, you must be in front of your computer and have a soldering iron, a voltmeter and a circuit tester available.

Say it with Flowers. Say it with power tools.

Have you got any nails? I'm on a diet.

"Profession?"