Hardware Hacker Pillows

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

'Of course things will a lot better in the future when we'll be able to not keep the records we don't keep now on the new 6 billion IT system.'

'Don't ask questions, Margaret -- Just get Bill Gates on the phone!'

Gadget geek.

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"Careful! He knows computers."

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

'What an execrable day. I got drenched in a Wiki leak and buried in a document dump.'

'Mommy -- Jimmy just wrote his first computer virus!'

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

"I want one that detects intrusions by hackers, then blows their computers to bits!"

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

Computer Crimes

"The treasury has hacked into his computer and asked for ideas to solve the deficit"

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

'A hacker broke into our computer and, in an act of human kindness, deleted your mother's recipe for peppers and meat loaf.'

"Never marry an engineer."

Computer hacker sends a rocket to Mars.

'He knows where the viruses are buried.'

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

'I accidentally hacked into Mom's microwave oven.'

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

'It's a foolproof computer network, sir, that no one can break into, not even a kid.'

'Gimme all your cache!'

"Our system's been cracked. How is that even possible?"

'Some hackers have broken into the system. It goes in as molten steel, and it comes out as chicken gumbo soup.'

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

The guy who took a wrong turn off the electronic superhighway and wound up in a microwave oven in Davenport, Iowa.

Proof of Being Human

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

'Now, now...no stealing people's data until you finish your brussels sprouts.'