Handshake Alternatives Aficionado T-Shirts

Elbow bump

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

'He wants to close the deal with a handshake. What do you think about that?'

Let's shake on it.

"I'll grip but I won't grin."

Man looking at a vending machine with a hand sticking out of it and a sign that reads "Put'er there buddy".

"Always give a good, firm handshake...then immediately sanitize your hands."

"I hate shaking hands with him, he always squeezes as hard as he can!"

'Contract? No contract. We do all our business with nothing more than a handshake.'

'I'm fist-bumping all of my patients now, because it spreads fewer germs than a handshake.'

'His references don't check out and he knows zip about the industry--but that handshake!'

Ping Pong Handshake.

"You're the perfect candidate but I'm afraid your handshake was just a teensy bit soft."

How to tell that it's Howie Mandel's dog you're dealing with.

Burgers Fries Shakes. Order Here. I think my college degree must be worth a lot --- It's hardly been used at all!

"Good trial." "Good trial." "Good trial."

"Why do they keep insisting on doing their old secret handshake?"

"Now that's she mastered martinis, let's move on to daquiris."

"Brilliant interview - this warm handshake means you've got the job."

'Sorry, I never know what to do with my hands in social situations.'

Isn't it nice to exchange some good old-fashioned germs again?

Liberation. You've removed your hypochondria mask. Is flu season over? Possibly for good. There's new research that shows that the warming of the globe is inhospitable to those @#$% flu bugs. The viruses thrive on cold weather. That might be why fly and head colds have been relatively mild. It's just wonderful. Of course, I still won't be shaking hands, or hugging, which are disgusting habits. And we'll all die when the planet overheats because we have no ozone. Are you sure you @#$ whining isn'

Men shaking hands without touching

Shake, boy, shake! Are you insane?

Weapons of mass lactation

Shaking hands.

'Those political campaign websites are getting really sophisticated.'

Bob practices lying.

Businessmen with hands in each others' pockets

'Please don't call me Mr. Carruthers. Mr. Carruthers is my father. I'm Dr. Carruthers.'

"Hurry up, MacDonalds can make a shake in 5 seconds"

"If you expect a treat you'll need to firm up that handshake."

Elbow bump

"I guess the fist bump as a greeting isn't quite confrontational enough these days."

Coronavirus and greetings