Hands-on Hero Gifts

Job Safety - Valves.

'I got the job, Mom. You always said I'd make a living with my hands.'

Blue-Collar Workers

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

"Yes, you do go the extra mile for this company. But you've been going in the wrong direction."

"This is my son...I want him to work his way up all the way from the bottom- even if it takes all day."

'That's why I like Neederman. He does the little things to help his team that don't show up in the statistics.'

'I can't party like I used to. I've got enough Tupperware.'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

"Now right-click on the icon."

'He kept his enthusiasm for DIY right up to the end.'

'So then I thought, what's the idea job for a gentleman with my years of experience, wisdom and a desire to help others.'

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

"Here's a video showing how to fix a toilet. It shows a guy calling a plumber."

"This one is for hacking into our enemy's hacks."

"You'll have to excuse the president. He misses his old days at the construction site."

Born to play ball.

"Yes, I'm still on hold and counting the billable minutes."

'They call it a remote because that's the chnaces of me being able to program it.'

"Looks like another case of someone over forty trying to understand Snapchat."

'Samaritans, mission control'

'I steal from the rich databases and give to the poor databases.'

A pirate fishes using his hook.

Do your own conveyancing...Do it yourself plumbing and heating...Embalm your own relatives.

'Be careful where you step. My dad says he has a lot of blood, sweat and tears in this ranch.'

'I don't mind hand-me-downs. I just wish my brother had played football.'

'You constructed a beautiful work table. You're a talented woodworking legend in your own life.'

'And then Steve Jobs invented apple computers.'

'Fighting evil, fighting evil, fighting evil...oh, wait, how about the 17th, say noonish?'

Computer use issues

'OK Smith, you can take this back to the Woodwork room now!'

Bluetooth was the future.

"Remember, measure twice, cut once, stand baffled, string together obscenities."

'Help me out!"