Hairdresser Gifts

"I love it. Who did it?"

Lawyer to bad hair lady: 'It's difficult to establish pain and suffering based on a bad hair day.'

'Not too much off the back.'

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

"It's not that complicated. Just give the man a haircut. It ain't brain surgery."

Express chair. 12 hairs or less.

Pandemic Haircut

Brigitte devises a way to double her productivity.

$2 Hair cut, $20 hats.

'It's my newer, cooler look. I'm hoping my younger clients will dig it.'

'Hello, I'm from the company that provides your gas, electricity, water, phone and internet. We were wondering ... who does your hair these days?'

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

'See you later, Honey.'

'Just the usual, thanks.'

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

The Queens Guard hair do.

1420: The court of Henry V. "Good news Sire! We have apprehended the man who cut your hair!"

Haircuts 20% off.

'I can't do a thing with it either!'

"Do you want it parted in the middle?"

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Jack-o-lantern in a Barbershop

Rachel Rapunzelstein

'My clippers are on the blink.'

'What makes you think your bartender is more qualified than my hairdresser to solve our marital problems?'

"Having reviewed her responses in the context of cognitive therapy with a psychodynamic input and some rational emotive behaviour we've concluded that she'd like it a bit longer at the back."

"Let's change things up a bit. Give me the crinkle cut."

'Cut both both short. Hair and the conversation!'

'You went for the highlights then?'

"For Facetime or Zoom?.."

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

Hairdressing Models

A pod of bleached whales,

"There's something you should consider before you begin—my hair works hard and it plays hard."