Hair Battle Strategist T-Shirts

"Don't let him on your lap. He's moulting!"

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

"Absolutely not!"

'Guy comes up with one interesting theory about special relativity, suddenly he thinks he's freakin' Einstein,'

Curling your hair for no reason

"It's nice but I'm starting to think we should just wait for his real hair to grow in."

"Tonight we dine with the devil. But tomorrow we really need to finish what's left in the fridge."

"We have a very special relationship with our barber."

Square Cut

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, what is up with my hair?!"

"Mirror, mirror on the wall ... what the heck is up with my hair?"

'More hair than brains.'

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Hail, Caesar! The barbarians have been beaten back, and Rome is still Numero Uno."

Hairstyles

"You've come to a fork in the road – age-defying or age-appropriate?"

This year I'm a different person. I'm starting school as the new, cooler me. Way to go, Twig! Diner. Everyone will notice the change. It feels kind of risky. I've never worn my hair down!

Sign # 23 that you've spent too much time at a game: your nails are longer than your fingers and your hair touches your ankles.

'I'm just curious, which one of you was dropped off by their boyfriend on a really fast motorcycle?'

It is a good idea to start by learning how to mount your pony.

"When I said hair transplant I meant more than one."

The Anti-flat shampoo worked.

Corporate pirate.

"Fashion over function!"

Bald man with a brush on his head

'Brother, the Lord takes a very dim view of the comb-over.'

'My kingdom for a horse! Are you nuts? How about high yielding mutual funds?'

Man with lots of hair, holding a bottle of hair tonic waits outside of the patents office.

"Oh stop it. You know perfectly well that before every battle the enemy shouts things at us that we may find offensive."

'My roots are starting to show.' 'You think you've got problems? I have a cowlick!'

"So, when do you hear back from the Chia people?"

'Look out, it's a double edged sword. . .'

"Highlight the battleship-gray."

Hair Salon.