Gunk Hoarder Pillows

Mrs. Bortluber saves all the gunk she cleans from her computer.

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"Sorry I locked us out of the ship but if waving this cloth we found makes you happy. . . I'll be happy to do it."

"So that's where all the socks ended up!"

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

"Tia Carmen's Bucket List: pulling a 7-day telenovela bender."

"I plan to retire when bank robbery becomes legal!"

"Which one of these things is the soap?"

"My father said I was too big for my britches!"

"Buckle up. We're in the midst of an unprecedented breadcrumb recession."

"I don't think you're getting the point of this exercise."

'With these crazy markets, you have to diversify to protect your money. Put some under your mattress, some in your sock drawer, maybe some in a hole in the yard...'

"He is so gross: He is a hoarder you see, and keeps all his old skins..."

The traveling Yard Sale.

Man emerges from baby changing room, having changed his baby for a crate of beer.

"You just can't accept that I've found someone 'extra special'." Best bitter / Pale Ale / Tennants Very Very Strong Lager.

'True, I don't know a lot about art, but junk, I know!'

'It's to help me cut down on gourds and such. It's the pumpkin patch.'

Al's Junk: Now selling Russian Govt. Bonds!

'I gotta be honest with you. . . I wouldn't be in business if it weren't for smart folks like you who can't pass up a bargain on stuff they don't need.'

"One day Son all this will be yours."

"And this set comes with a year's supply of replacement socks."

"Someday, Son, this unnecessary and outdated stuff will all be yours."

"One day at a time, Ethel, I take it one day at a time. So far this year, it has been the usual assortment of useless junk. Last week, he located a dump scow, and he spent all this week dragging a 1929 Ford engine block out of the river. . ."

"Well sold all OUR junk - he bought all this new junk off the table next door."

"You know what I want for our twentieth anniversary? A Dumpster."

Garage Sales

"It's Joe's junk yard. He wants to buy some air time on the trashiest show we've got."

"Aren't you supposed to get rid of the old mobile, when you buy a new one."

"I will not buy a fridge magnet. . ."

"Collects his paper every morning - regular as clockwork!"

Antiques Roadkill.