Gun Culture Satirists Gifts

"Go to bed!""No!"

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

"Quick! Get your gun, Pa! Here come the suburbs."

'Not only did he say I can circumcise him, but he also said there'll be six more weeks of winter.'

"Say your prayers, liturgies, Tefilah, Daily Salat, Sacred Mantra, Ritual Incantation or the secular affirmation of your choice, Varmint!”

"Those bullet holes are something new, aren't they?"

"Everyone should open carry at all times."

'What do you mean you don't rent helicopters?' (Santa shot all his reindeer)

'I know the difference between right and wrong... but not the on/off position of the safety on my gun.'

Big car with machine gun poking through window, bumper sticker reads: Yardie on board.

"We still don't have children. He's been shooting blanks."

'Don't worry, he never misses ... except when he's been drinking, like tonight.'

'It looks like a Homeland Security sting operation.'

After Frugal: marked by difficulty parting with money. The strong inward force experienced by a unit of currency clasped in the hand of a rotating Scotsman.

"Up here you can call gun freaks gun freaks."

"A gun... Really!"

"Dad, can I borrow the gun tonight?"

"Didn't you know. . . God is an American."

Shooting Leaves

Salvaging the F-35

'Tush, tush...did you see that, Sport? Plastic corks!'

'Oh good Lord! 'Tourists'? I thought you said 'Terrorists'!'

"My clients object to the term 'hit men.' They like to think of themselves as a well-regulated militia."

Shooting Star

Selling Arms and Leg

The NRA kiddies coloring book

"I think the Elvis business has just about run its course."

Please adjust your dress before you go out shooting.

"They're saying the whole village enjoyed an Indian take-away last night."

'Fifty megatons? — I certainly hope it has a trigger lock!'

'We get Lt. Withers to play a French dandy and try to intimidate the new recruits.'

BOB THE MUGGER - Ring bell for service

"Do you have any organic bullets?"

Building Blocks Spell AK47.

The Proper Use of Assault Rifles