Guitar Strummer Gifts

"'I'm a good dog, Mama, I'll bring you your daily news. I'm a good dog, Mama, I don't chew my master's shoes. But there's one thing life has learnt me - Even good dogs get the blues.' Blow some sweet harp for me, Lucky."

'Hey, who's playing the maracas? Nobody in this band plays maracas.'

'Woke up this mornin' with the end-of-financial-year-report blues.'

"Here's a little song I wrote in prison. Actually, I was at Motor Vehicle renewing my license, but it SEEMED like prison."

"Here's a blues number written about my inability to remember computer passwords."

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

Lazy folk singer.

Hitchhiking timetraveller.

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

'Elaine, take a ditty.'

Dog training school(Advanced begging Dept.)

Bobby Biddle, world's worst country singer.

Two musicians

'If you knew Sushi, like I knew Sushi...'

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

The New Modern-Day Lament.

Boy kangaroo serenading girl kangaroo

'I could have been the next Neil Young, but my ol' man made me take singing lessons.'

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

The Jimi Hendrix tennis camp for girls

How hit songs get their names

"..Not cloudy all day."

Happy Entrails To You....

Jimmie Rodgers

"I'm singing the 'no one LIKED my vacation facebook post' blues."

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

"Woke up this morning, forgot my apple id..."

"My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references."

"Here's another depressing song about me."

"Not tonight, hon—I've got a heartache."

"I said this next number is a sing-along."

"Can you forget about that damn moon for two seconds and lend me a hand with the harmony?"

"This here is a little number I wrote when I recovered a repressed memory."

Romance 101

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"