Guest House Owner Pillows

'Yes,that's right-just a stone's throw from the beach...'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

Use your imagination.

'We earn extra money by renting out your office at night.'

'Now here's a place I like!'

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'I thought I would rent it out for the extra dough.'

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

New Hampshire Minute

'For Sale by Neighbor'

Gypsy curses didn't seem so threatening after the Mummy went into the peg business.

"The pH level seems a little off."

"This should be cozy. Just let me know if you need an extra sousaphone."

"I aways thought it would be stylish to live in a house with high ceilings."

'The bad news is the Big Bad Wolf is coming. The good news is I've got some great rates on Homeowner's Insurance!'

'The Hunt family have solved the problem of the fire ants.'

'How much did you say we'd be saving by buying a wood-burning stove?'

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

Ino & Frieda's 'Bed and Bagel'

'Hey! By appointment only!!'

Ed discovers that building his greenhoue outside the leftfield wall was a huge mistake!

'You can't beat the old style security systems!'

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

"As the owner of a hotel chain, I found being shipwrecked quite a challenge."

'If you promise to never try to openthe locked attic door, the owner will take $20,000 off!'

Man in woods sees sign, 'No Trespassing', next to 'Go Ahead - Make Our Day!'

'One good thing about this place is that I can honestly say I own everything as far as the eye can see.'

"Decaf for me, Peter."

William and Real Estate

Mattress sale