Guardian Of The Pearly Gates Gifts

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

Lovers' leap with chaperone observation point.

The Bearskin Hat Family

'I can't stand his 'holier than thou' attitude.'

'I'm a guard dog too.'

'Poor thing. He got left out in the acid rain.'

Beefeater

'My dear boy its a wonderful display of post modern expressionism with overtones of Dada.'

'It's good to see Dad keeping his mind active.'

"Law & Order: Museum Guards."

Salvador Dali museum

"This one I feel like protecting, the others I don't."

Sabrage

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

Museum Guard Portrait

'Thank goodness you got here in time. Frank was going to start without you.'

Heavenly Take Out

Soldier.

Man at Heaven's gate with different college letter than St. Pete

'What do you mean you're a vegetarian?'

"Hey, who died and gave you the right to determine my water rights?"

'So what do you do?'

Grenadiers

"Funny Uniform!/Funny Hat!"

"Excuse me where are the dinosaurs."

"The custodian's job is 10 percent janitorial and 90 percent as my bodyguard."

"It is exactly hundred million and four years, 6 months, 2 weeks and 4 days old. I know that because it was a hundred million years old when I started work here..."

Lollipop mask

Museum of Natural History.

'Did your helmet just peep at my helmet?'

"Bob's daily nap became one of the most popular museum exhibits."

"I'm not a guru. I just came up here to get away from fumes of pollution deregulation."

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."