Group Dynamics Analyst Pillows

Herd Mentality.

'Individually lemmings are fine, but get a bunch of 'em together and they'll head straight for the nearest cliff.'

"The new guy isn't working out."

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

"The unlucky lemming"

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

It come's to my attention that you have been doing the work of two men.

"Next on the agenda: How can we crush workers' spirit, while appearing to care?"

"It's time for your performance review where I damn you with faint praise."

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

"It's late. I am not getting into another heated discussion with you."

'Hank here brings 10 years of top sales experience to our company so let's all try to make him feel welcome while he makes you all look bad...'

'To foster a sense of trust, I always like to end each session with a group hug.'

"I want to know why when I'm in a room people ignore me."

'Dayton, you're a decent, respectable, ethical, honest and nice guy. What the hell are you up to?'

Corporate Scapegoat of the Month (Poster hanging on company hallway)

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

(Phil Hanson and the Philettes)

Committee On Feline Healthcare

Coming to a consensus.

Above Reproach.

Poplar Trees/Not very Poplar Trees.

Cohesion Of Cohort/Shared Behaviors

"Let's welcome our new member, Bob!" "You, too!" "'You, too'? Idiot!"

Abstraction and recognition

'Women, can't live with 'em, can't live without em.'

'One businessman's lunch and one lackey's lunch.'

"I've always said: For that satisfying sense of inclusion, you can't beat a class action suit."

'This is quite a scathing memo, Jane. Would you mind elaborating on the 'pervasive herd mentality' you claim our firm is riddled with?'

"I think I speak for all of us."

"I married a girl with two mums and ended up with two mothers-in-law."

Belonging to a group can be motivational.

"You never told me what you thought of 'Wolverine.'" "I was waiting." "For what?" "For the consensus." "My own immediate reaction to any piece of entertainment could be biased. I need to read tweets and posts before I settle on a verdict." "If my view differs too much from the hive mind, it's not valid."

'It's nothing personal, Johnson, we're letting all the deadwood go.'

'Boy, look at his personal space!'