Gritty Storytellers Gifts

"At least we have a roof over our heads."

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

Home Sweet Home

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

Pastries and Candy

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

'Are we there yet?'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'He was a great writer'

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

Jorge Luis Borges

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

"Ever since the layoffs, I feel like we've been doing the work of twenty clowns."

'Tell me about your gap year, Mr, Van Winkle,'

How I met your mother

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

'New hope for dysfunctional couples: Read aloud the complete works of Trollope.'

Having moved to a tablet, the farmer's wife was done with mice. . .

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

How James and John became known as "Sons of Thunder".

BOOKS ON VIDEO/BOOKS ON TAPE/READ YOUR OWN.

"Honestly, I thought you were a metaphor."

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'