Great Dane Admirers Pillows

'Marmaduke understands it differently than most dogs when you tell him to 'stay'.'

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

"He was a very good boy."

'He does lack social skills.'

'Burying things is his version of spring cleaning.'

'Sure, it's our pool. . . but who's going to tell him that?'

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

Fifty Shades of Gray

Hombre's Best Friend.

"We should get out to the country more often."

"Don't tell anyone, but some of my best cartoons are about cats."

Flea Philosophy.

Good, but not Great Danes.

Hyenas as Pets

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

"I'm not concerned about us as long as there is nothing in the stimulus package for cats."

"In the spirit of compromise, Canada is willing to offer any state of the United States, sanctuary if they wish to secede."

"Wow, these are good!"

'As I said to Phil, 'Call a plumber!''

'The good news is it's not bird flu.'

'Why do they call it walking the dog?'

"Quit saying 'President Trump'. You're spookin' the horses."

'I like their lollipops. If we ever get any money, we ought to open an account here.'

Butch didn't mark his territory like other dogs.

'The swimmers line up for this, the final heat, and surprise, surprise, It's the dog paddle.'

'He's part Great Dane and part couch potato.'

'Don't even think about it. Your food bill is high enough.'

Could I trade in this greyhound for a dachshund? My doctor says I have to slow up.

"Damn, she's good."

'Nope. He doesn't qualify you for the carpool lane.'

'The news has started a MarmWatch segment as a public service.'