Gravity-defying Dancer Gifts

Dancers caught in quick sand.

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

'I'm too hot to trot.'

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

'You're about to see a drive for the ages!'

"I thought the cake came out awfully dense."

And I like to call this my 'dance of the enhanced PEP at alternative firms'.

'Personally I think one great improvement to these tea dances would be some tables.'

"I told you it was a book you couldn't put down."

"How long were you in that headstand?"

The Stripper

Disco Dancing

'I'm sorry, Mr. President, he can't come to the phone right now...he's doing that crazy hand jive.'

"I wrote this song for Catalina, the woman who's taught me almost everything..."

"Okay, come at me in a conga line."

Rule 1: Cows must be taught to obey the laws of physics!

'This new star sends out periodic pulses in a very appealing rhythm -- I think I'll name it 'Bossa Nova.''

"I got this new hat for when we do the collection at the end."

"He only dances to The Dubliners."

Colin attempted to demonstrate his travel choices through the medium of contemporary dance.

Ballerina

Dog urinating against a table dancer's pole.

A sheep shearing herself on stage - A sheep strip show

'WOOHOOO! Yeah BABY, yeah!' (at a zebra strip show)

Fishman disco dances in the light of a lighthouse with a disco ball.

"At least I won't have to jump out of these silly things for a living any more."

Mile high skydivers

Bell Bottoms

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"A stripper in Ohio claims her privacy was violated when a patron took a picture of her while she was performing, thus invoking her Constitutional right to irony."

Pole Dancing Every Night: 'It's one of the perks of being a weights and measures inspector.'

"It's hard to hear through all the music but I think they said something about discovering nightlife on Mars."

"Sure her act is legal in a nightclub - but she was doing it in the street."