Grass Aficionados Pillows

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

I guess she had other plans for you.

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

Comb Sweet Comb

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

THe UDDER Side

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

"Graham loved his creature comforts."

Free Range Golfers

Beware of the Lawn

Cow Pollen

Cow yin yang spots.

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'What, not even a kiss first?'

Food Prices and the Ukraine War

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

I love tennis

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

Mower Repair

Shoot, I forgot about that underground sprinkler.

'How is it on gas? I was afraid you were going to ask me that.'

My parents had a mutual love of grass.