Grant-getting Enthusiast Pillows

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

Charities should investigate whether published reports are 'Misleadingly Positive'.

YOU HAVE A VERY LARGE GENIUS GRANT LINE.

More people working in Voluntary sector than 2010.

'I'm freezing...The rich list is a little thin this year.'

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

"I got my first paycheck, and now I understand why our organization is classified as a nonprofit."

"What are we doing wrong?"

"...I want to find out whether there's any truth in the belief that money can't buy happiness."

'Your very generous charitable contribution shows up as this very slight blip right here.'

'Agreed, 'Laplace Algebra Matrix Expansion' is a good topic, but we'd better find a better acronym if we want to secure a Research Grant...'

This program is made possible by donations from Don and Mary Doughaberg, and from lowlifes like you who never get their names mentioned.

"Great. First our funding ran out, now the rat."

'Profit or non-profit?'

"Our funding runs out in a month. Will everyone please think a little faster?"

Campaign Trail

"I gave on the E train."

Professional Fund Riasers

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

"Do you have this grant in a bigger size?"

Charity mugger

"And a small donation will ensure the survival of undreds of snowballs throughout the summer months..."

"Crowd-funding's fantastic but the crowd-thanking is a real drag."

"Bono is nice, and Bono cares, but I really dig Barry Manilow."

"Building fund not going well, Reverend?"

Benefactor of children

"God it was rough coming into the office this morning after the awards ceremony" "It must have been, you work two doors down"

'Just what I wanted. Not!'